So, as it turns out, the "Secret" service is actually a bunch of blabber mouths. What good is a code name if everybody knows who its code for? Somebody at the blabber mouth service told somebody in the news media what all of the candidates and their spouses go by when they mention us on walkie talkies. But, now that the cat's out of the bag (or, as we like to say in Alaska, the grizzly's out of the gate!), I guess we can talk about it too! Mr. McCain is Phoenix and Cindy is Parasol (is that another type of bird, like a Phoenix? I don't think we have Phoenixes or Parasols in Alaska.), and the democrats are a bunch of stupid stuff that doesn't make any sense. But if you ask me, Todd and I (hi Todd!!) got the best names in the whole bunch. I'm Denali and Todd is Driller! These were actually both names we had been thinking about in case we have any more kids. But now we get to have them ourselves, it's so fun!!!
Denali is a national park and a mountain in Alaska! Denali means The Great One in Indian. Isn't that sweet? They think I'm great! And not just great, but the great ONE! Like, better than everybody else! It's so cool that the Secret Service is throwing their support behind me like that. Denli is a pretty tough mountain to climb (just as Todd! LOL!), but if you get to the top its totally worth it. And, when you get to the top, you're even closer to Heaven. We're planning a family hiking and hunting trip up there as soon as the election is over.
Todd's name, Driller, is so awesome. It's "on message" (as the campaign folks always want me to be! sort of!) and reminds people to DRILL BABY DRILL! And you know who drills better than anyone I know? My Todd! (LOL!) And Todd has actual drilling experience in oil fields. And it sounds kind of tough and manly and is just so fitting for the first dude. Even if we're #2 in office, he'll still be my #1 driller!
So that's how we got our names. I wonder if we get new names once we're elected? Or maybe a second set of even more super secret names that only certain secret service dudes know about? What do you think they should be?