Oh gosh am I embarrassed.
I guess a lot of you already know that "liberel" isn't a real word. But it sure was news to me! And now my face is as red as a mooseburger cooked up rare and painted in lipstick!
You folks probably deserve an explanation, since I might be president some day and be writing emails to other world leaders and such. So here goes: Lots of you--some pretty unkind--emailed me to tell me how "liberel" was really spelled. Like this one guy who, for purposes of synonymity we'll call Joe B... or wait, no. I don't like the sound of that. Let's call him J. Biden, instead.
Hey, Sarah, I'm literally really looking forward to debating you, but I'm having kindof a huge problem, and I was hoping you could help. It's not about winning; if you win or I win, doesn't matter. And I wish you luck. Literally. But if I literally clobber you--and, no offense, when I read your blog, it makes me think I will--then it might make me look like a bully and backfire on me. And that's not right. Winners should get to enjoy winning. Imagine if Todd wasn't allowed to keep all his snow machine medals because they thought he'd won by "too much". It just wouldn't be fair.
So I figure you should educate yourself, and you can start by reading the dictionary. I mean, hasn't anybody pointed out to you by now that the word is spelled "liberal" and not "liberel"? I mean c'mon! Don't computers in Alaska have spell-check?!
Anyhow, I'm sure you're getting good instruction from John's folks, so hopefully you'll be up to snuff when we go at it in a few weeks.
Sen. xxxxx, (D-Del.)
Ok, duh, Mr. Anonymoose. Computers in Alaska are the same as computers in Deleware. And yes, I admit, my computer did keep underlining the word 'liberel' in red. Usually trust my computer's dictionary! Honest I do! But this one just didn't sit right with me. I mean, first of all, Mr. McCain keeps talking about all these good "classical liberal" things that he says he believes in and that would make Cindy richer, and HE'S not a liberel. And Mr. Bush, well he talks about bringing "liberal democracy" around the world, and he HATES liberels. Add that to the fact that "liberels" like to hang out in the "liberery" (and read those sin books) and I just decided the computer was wrong. Can you blame me?
Anyways, joke's on me, because Mr. Bush and Mr. McCain were just using different definitions of the same word. Apparently in English-teacher terms, that's called a "homophone", which I always thought was an accessory for people with good gaydar, but I guess we learn a few new things about words every day.
So there's the explanation. But just because I know more about the word "liberal" don't get all upset if I mess up a few more times. It's hard to teach an old bull dog new tricks.