Welcome To The PalinDrome: Sarah Palin's Blog

Debate Live Blog

Guest Blogger: Todd Palin

Well allright. Its my baby's time to shine!  I'm here in St. Louis but I donno yet if Im actually gonna watch from the audience or not.  I wont lie, I got bored earlier and got into the minibar, so Steve's been saying I don't get to go down and see the thing live.  I said like hell I dont! But I don't know, also its pretty comfortable up here and I might be able to blog easier than from my blackberry.  An its true Im feelin pretty good right now.

9:00 - OK, I'm at least starting things out up here in the room.  Kind of flipping around, not sure where I'll end up but CNN is in the lead right now.  They got these circles on the side of the TV, and a bunch of regular folks with dials to rate the whole thing.  It's all pretty scientific, like how they score boxing.

9:03 - Blah blah blah I'm Joe Biden.  Man who would even listen to this guy?  He doesn't even drive a truck.

9:06 - Yeah, Sarah! Nice opener, baby.  That thing about soccer was Steve's idea, its meant to get more hispanic people to vote for us.

9:08 - Was that a wink?! I mean fine, I know its TV, but Im just saying Brad better not be in this f***ing building.

9:11 - I think Sarah is right, the people need to rise up!  We need to tear those Wall Street boys up, I am sick of them an I bet you are too.

9:14 - Im glad Sarah is talking about about cutting taxes when she was mayor. I mean OK, the hockey arena actually cost a lot of money.  But its like how they dont count the army when their doing the budget, you shouldn't really count that.

9:19 - Steve says I should remind everyone that the financial services industry is composed of patriotic Americans who have proven to be steadfast allies of those who fight for less burdensome regulation and more robust economic growth. OK its me again.

9:22 - Sarah is talking about taking on the oil companies in Alaska.  I can maybe add some insite, she did it all right. She kept tellin em you should drill more and give us more money!  And they tried to say no, but then she made em.  And you know what? It definitely made things a little uncomfortable when I took her to my office xmas party at BP (at least until everyone had had a few).  She is a tough cookie, take it from me.

9:30 - OK, got a little lost there.  I think that energy independence is going to prevent people from going bankrupt? I never claimed to be as smart as Sarah, she is definitely the brains in the family.  Sometimes I cant really follow what shes saying, its at such a high level I hardly understand a word.

9:34 - I will never understand why the democrat party cannot for the life of them pronounce the work nucular.

9:36 - OK on to homos. I got nothing against em I guess.  Sarah is even more open minded, in fact one of her best friends is a gay.  But shes right, marriage is between a man and a woman. Or between a man or a woman and Jesus, I guess (if one of them is a priest or nun).

9:42 - Ive been on the campaign trail for a while now, and I can tell you I am so sick of Iraq. I think everyone else is too, but that doesnt mean we can stop, it just means we want to stop hearing so much about it! Its like when you sign up for a record club but then they jack up the price and you cant stop paying, they'll just hire a collection agency! You gotta just keep sending those checks until its over.  Iraq is like that.  You just have to try not to think about it too much except when you're enjoying the Toby Keith CDs or oil or whatever.

9:49 - Shoutout to Hank Kissinger!  Hell yeah, Hank!  He must of been tickled by that.  Sarah and I have both become really good friends with him, I could tell you some stories about what that boy gets up to but I probably shouldnt, all I'll say is the man can hold his liquor.

9:51 - Biden just mentioned Spain, I think that is his first major slip up.  America knows the score about Spain... and we're sick of it!  You dont want to associate with those people Mr. Biden. Bad move.

10:01 - Oh man. Does anyone know how late is this supposed to go?  I'm trying to pay attention to all this stuff about nukes but honestly it's just reminding me that War Games was on TBS earlier today.  That movie is all right.  I talked to Sarah about it after, we agreed when she's elected she should definitely put a stop to that missile computer stuff.

10:08 - Team of mavericks! Like when batman teams up with catwoman! I think that is the image America is going to come away with tonight.

10:17 - OK flipped away for a while, the History channel is showing Tombstone!!! I hope this wraps up soon, they hadnt gotten to the part where everybody gets shot but its coming up!

10:29 - I couldn't resist, I watched some more.  In my defense Wyatt Earp is also pretty much a maverick.  But back to the debate, I think it was a good closing statement. The one point I think it was really good for Sarah to make was about the main streamed media, they have been against us from the start.

Well I suppose I got a little impatient toward the end there, but man these things are long.  I think Sarah won it but then I never had any doubt.  Way to go baby, tonight you were America's "huckleberry"!

The main event!!!

It's the big day!!!  We've been practicing pretty much nonstop over the past week, I haven't hardly had time to breath much less blog.  I am pretty excited for tonight, and I bet you are too.  But I hope you will keep a few things in mind.

1. First and four most, look at who the moderator is: GWEN AWFUL! Okay actually her name is Eiffel, but you'll see why I gave her that nickname in a second. It turns out that she is writing a book and it's about OBAMA.  So we know she is going to be bias tonight.  It's pretty much like reverse racism, although not exactly (Obama and Eiffel are both black).

2. Remember that what you see tonight is not the "final product"! Even after this debate there is almost a month until the election, and then almost two more before John and I are sworn in!  Think about how far I have come in just one month, I should be 3x as good by inauguration! So if you hear one of my answers and find yourself thinking "hmm, that answer was just okay" try to imagine if it was THREE TIMES BETTER, because it will be.

3. Is Joe Biden going to be sexist? I can't say for sure yet but if he is it will be unfair.

4. To be honest I have not been feeling well today, I am going to buy some headache powder and see how things go but I may not be 100%.

So just keep all this in mind, but overall I am really feeling good about the debate (Todd says he is "stoked", he might try to live blog it again like with my speech).  Ask any of my old debate opponents, they will tell you I have a few tricks up my sleeve!  And also even though the moderator is Gwen Awful, I think there will probably be fewer impossible "gotcha" like asking me to name newspapers or old Supreme Court cases. The American People wouldn't stand for it.

About the debate

I'm glad everyone's so interested, but you guys I don't know anything more than you do.  Please stop IMing me, I will update the evite as soon as I hear anything. 

It has been crazy around here since John went to fix the economy.  Not only is the campaign suspended, but that's on top of all the normal stuff like doing press and fundraising and making speeches and making sure the ads are running.  Believe me, it sounds like it should be kind of relaxing, but actually it's pretty much the same as usual except Steve is always reminding everyone to be "high minded".

The only good thing about all of this is there's a chance that my debate might get cancelled too.  Of course I want to talk about the issues (and to show the country that I would be a much better Vice President than boring old Joe Biden).  But it sure would be a relief if we could just postpone it a little, or do it by mail or something.

What The EFF?

Guest Blogger: Todd Palin

Seriously? Seriously???? Brad, bro, we've had our differences but even you will agree that you're a Kawasaki to my Honda. Nice try Enquirer.

UN as in UN-American

Whew! I'm sorry I haven't had a chance to write more, I have been busy as a bee down here in New York City.  You might have heard about it, I'm on this whole trip to get Foreign Policy experience and meet some of the presidents of other countries that I'm going to have to work with when I'm Vice President.  It's kind of like when you move into a new neighborhood and have to go around and say hi to the neighbors.  Nerve racking to say the least!

Of course it doesn't help that the whole thing has to happen in New York City, and then at the United Nations besides!  That is pretty much the least patriotic place on the planet, I was not looking forward to it.  I did feel prepared though, John arranged to have Mr. Bolton speak to me about it on the phone.  Actually I'm embarrassed to say we tried to meet in person first, but I just could not stop cracking up at that mustache of his.  If you've ever spent any time around walruses or even just seals you know what I mean. I felt terrible but I guess I just had a case of the giggles. Finally Mr. Bolton suggested we talk some other time, and when we chatted on the phone later that afternoon everything was fine.  In fact we had a really good talk, he basically said 1. the UN is exactly as bad as you imagine and 2. don't be afraid to stand up to them!  From there we kind of got off on a tangent about the Left Behind books.  But all in all it was still a really good talk, and I appreciated the advice.

But I still had a case of the butterflies when we started the meetings.  I was really tired too from staying up baking the night before -- I thought it would be nice to bring everyone I met with a little zip-lock baggy of cookies, but maybe I would have been better off getting some sleep instead.

Fortunately my first meeting wasn't that tough.  It was with President Karzai of Afghanistan, and I think he was running a little behind too (he didn't even seem to have had time to change out of his pajamas).  Anyway he really liked the cookies, and then we got to chatting about our sons.  His son Mirwais was just born last year, so we talked about what it's like having a baby in the house.  Then we got to talking about his nephew Jamil and my Track. We both agreed that they would get along great, so I gave him Track's email address to give to Jamil (I hope that's OK, honey!).  It is such a shame that Track was deployed to Iraq instead of Afghanistan, if he had I'm sure they'd be thick as thieves in no time.  I said that maybe Track can visit for a weekend sometime, and Mr. Karzai said he thought Jamil would like that.

So that meeting was really good, but next up was President Ooribay from Columbia, and we had NOTHING in common.  He just gave the cookies to his assistant and said he'd have them later, which I thought was a little rude but I decided not to let it get to me.  I was trying to think of anything to talk about, but all I could come up with was the old episodes of Gunsmoke that I used to listen to with my meemaw, and which I remembered were made by his country's broadcasting system.  But I don't think Mr. Ooribay knows Gunsmoke, so we just kind of sat there talking about the weather and those headsets everybody seems to wear around the UN.  I swear, it was the longest ten minutes of my life.

Fortunately my final meeting was with someone who is quickly becoming a great friend on the campaign, Hank Kissinger. I think he could tell that I was a little frazzled by then, so he just said "Why don't we knock off early?" and instead we went down the street and got some soft-serve from McDonald's.  It was great to get out of that building, and to be reminded that there are people out there who care about me and will help me through this whole process.  President Ooribay is just one person, and his country's not very important anyway (maybe they could change that if they spent a little less time being rude and a little more time fighting drug lords!).

Back to the rat race

Guest Blogger: Todd Palin

Well Im back. And none too pleased about it I can tell you. Not only didnt I catch any fish, I didnt even GET TO FISH.

I'll back up, Terry marched up to me on Friday, he'd been storming around the office all day. He says Todd how would you like to go on a trip? Well what kind of trip I asked. Uh, how bout fishing maybe? he says. Well that sounded pretty good to me. You all know I do some fishing for work when Im not on call with BP. That is hard d*** work tho, this sounded like maybe itd be a chance to relax before things got crazy. So I said sign me up!

Terry wanted to hit the road right away so we flew back home then drove out to some hotel in the middle of nowhere. Terry said it was on the way, I didnt know tho, he told me to just sit tight while he went and made some calls and to not open the door unless it was him. He said Just do this one thing for me Todd and I promise we'll go get dinner at H**ters (Im sorry Sarah I swear I never go on my own but the wings are really good and I never get to try them). I said Id be good.

I was pretty bored by the time somebody knocked. Mr. Palin open the door! they says, but I yelled back He aint here! Well we yelled some more until I said God d***it I ain't opening this door an that's final! And then they left a while an I watched some more Meerkat Manor. But I was getting awful hungry, then someone knocked and said they had a pizza to deliver. I asked what kind, it all seemed to check out, so I opened the door.

Well I didnt end up with any god d*** pizza, and when Terry got back he was madder than a wet hen, you can be sure we didn't go get any wings neither. Instead I just ended up with a supeena in my hand and an empty stomach.

See there's this investigation going on about when Sarah had Mike fired. Its pretty stupid, I mean Sarah was head of Alaska when it happened, obviously she can fire people who work FOR ALASKA, she was everybody's boss! In fact when this whole thing came out she and I put our heads together over a fancy dinner and after a few bottles of Yellow Tail we said "F THOSE GUYS/BRING IT ON!" The next morning she issued a statement about it and everything.

Since then tho it turns out that Obama was behind it all, so the right thing to do is not answer any questions. I guess thats fine, they say theres a chance we could get in trouble for it but once Sarah's elected she can just pardon us anyway, Im not too worried. But the bad part about it is one, no fish, and two I have to start talking to reporters.

All right I admit it I got a little tongue tied around a pretty lady. I dont think thats a crime!

Greta is very nice but Im only used to Sarah calling me first dude, its kind of a thing with us. So when she kept asking me about it it sort of threw me for a loop. Also when she had me talk about my snowmobiling she made me sit behind her on it and reach around her to show her how to hold the throttle. That was weird too.

Anyway this was bad enough but I dont think most of them will be as nice as Miss Van Sustrin, I'm kind of dreading it. I wish Id stayed in that hotel room and just settled for the Chinese delivery guy that came by before the pizza.

Email is supposed to be PRIVATE

Just because I'm running for Vice President doesn't give anyone the right to hack into my PRIVATE EMAIL. OK so sure I used it for talking to people about Alaska government stuff but HELLO I think that was just being smart! Remember a little thing called "Waters Gate"? I dont think the country needs to go through something like THAT again. So basically I was keeping stuff private FOR the sake of america/alaska.

Anyway how the heck did they get my password? It even had a symbol in it! How could anyone ever figure that it was i<3wolves ???  Arrrghh, I should never have changed it. When I first got the account I had the idea to set the password as "password". I'm no Steve Gates, but THAT'S pretty darn tricky.

Denali & Driller!

So, as it turns out, the "Secret" service is actually a bunch of blabber mouths. What good is a code name if everybody knows who its code for? Somebody at the blabber mouth service told somebody in the news media what all of the candidates and their spouses go by when they mention us on walkie talkies. But, now that the cat's out of the bag (or, as we like to say in Alaska, the grizzly's out of the gate!), I guess we can talk about it too! Mr. McCain is Phoenix and Cindy is Parasol (is that another type of bird, like a Phoenix? I don't think we have Phoenixes or Parasols in Alaska.), and the democrats are a bunch of stupid stuff that doesn't make any sense. But if you ask me, Todd and I (hi Todd!!) got the best names in the whole bunch. I'm Denali and Todd is Driller! These were actually both names we had been thinking about in case we have any more kids. But now we get to have them ourselves, it's so fun!!!

Denali is a national park and a mountain in Alaska! Denali means The Great One in Indian. Isn't that sweet? They think I'm great! And not just great, but the great ONE! Like, better than everybody else! It's so cool that the Secret Service is throwing their support behind me like that. Denli is a pretty tough mountain to climb (just as Todd! LOL!), but if you get to the top its totally worth it. And, when you get to the top, you're even closer to Heaven. We're planning a family hiking and hunting trip up there as soon as the election is over.

Todd's name, Driller, is so awesome. It's "on message" (as the campaign folks always want me to be! sort of!) and reminds people to DRILL BABY DRILL! And you know who drills better than anyone I know? My Todd! (LOL!) And Todd has actual drilling experience in oil fields. And it sounds kind of tough and manly and is just so fitting for the first dude. Even if we're #2 in office, he'll still be my #1 driller!

So that's how we got our names. I wonder if we get new names once we're elected? Or maybe a second set of even more super secret names that only certain secret service dudes know about? What do you think they should be?

my ink

Guest Blogger: Levi Johnston

Wassup people.  I know its been a while--Mrs. P has been changing the pwd here, which is pretty lame if u ask me. Ive been wanting to write more here, specially since I hear it's getting mad traffic from google.  I figure you guys would like to know what it's like on the campaign trizail.  Also this whole experience has been making me get a lot more serious about my music.  Im gonna need a career to support Briss, right?  Also, yknow, the baby.  You might think itd be hard to do, like with flying around the country & s***, but I actually got the idea from a super-old copy of Spin on the plane where this band the Postal Service recorded a album by sending tracks + vocals back & forth--pretty cool (altho when I got the the album off rhapsody it turned out to be totally gay).

So my buddy Andy lays down his beats and sends em to me, then I record my flow over it (Audacity, son!). Its pretty tight, cept sending biga** files over yahoo messenger always ALWAYS gets f***ed up. Anyway I hope I can post some of the tracks here soon. Id do it now but Mrs. P says I gotta record clean versions.

Right, so the reason for this, Mrs. P said I could put up a photo of the tattoo I got and what it means to me.

This is actually just the start.  Eventually I want, like, this huge sleeve--I had it sketched out but I lost it, Im working on doing it over now but need to wait till Im back in W-town, cuz my boy Carl draws a awesome Ryu.  Short version--Ryu and Jesus are down by my wrist firing a hadoken at this sweet-a** dragon & his flames run onto my back and THEN turn into shadow demon wings like that guy from The Darkness (the game, not those british p***ies). Eventually I might connect it up with the other arm, Im not sure yet. But so far all Ive got is A) the chinese symbol for "POWER" between my shoulders (I forgot mention that before) and B) what was supposed to be the dragon but looks more like a dinosaur cause I was a dumba** and went tubing the day after I got it. Oh, & C, the ring with Briss's name. I'm not too worried about the dragon tho--thats the great thing about a tattoo, you can always get more ink to turn a old one into something else ;-)

Eagle!

Thanks so much to Mary C. for sending me a link to this site, sarahpalineagle.com.  A gentleman named Vann Black was in Ketchikan and took a photo of a bald eagle sitting on an American flag when he heard the news that I was picked to be Vice President!  You should really go to his site and have a look.  It is a lovely photo Vann, thank you for sharing it with the world.  I think it really shows off the grace & beauty & subtlety of the Alaska way of life.

Incidentally, Ketchikan is where that so-called bridge to "nowhere" was going.  Vann was kayaking, so that's fine for him but without a bridge other people can't come and see sights like this!